Blog #Victorious Living


24Jun

Ruth Almada, shares her incredible story--Strength in Scars--to give hope to ones's extraordinary circumstances--especially from the pain of generational abuse.

Ruth Almada

"Wisdom is the principal thing;
Therefore get wisdom.
And in all your getting, get understanding."
(Proverbs 4:7)

In this life, we do not choose who we are born to or in what conditions we are born under. God knows what He is doing, and He never makes a mistake. In my book and story, there is nothing that is politically correct, ear tickling, watered down or sugar coated. It is as raw and authentic as it gets because that’s what this world needs more of-- especially, when sharing about the very REAL power of God in our lives.

My story starts off knowing, that we live in a fallen world run by the devil, and evidence of this is literally--in every single facet of the conditions that I lived in. It was most definitely not an easy journey, and with being born to two lost folks (my parents)--I was bound by decades of generational curses at the time of birth. However, Jesus had another plan.

A plan so powerful that knowing about it now, still very much leaves me in moments of sheer amazement and utter gratitude. A plan so powerful that I am able to thank God for our trials today. I have learned along the way, that Jesus is pulling many people out of the very same hell we endured. There are no words that can properly describe this other than GLORY to God in the highest!

Here is a summary of my story:

As a child, we learn based on what is poured into our lives, experiences and environment. There is a large family dynamic, that God has lovingly and powerfully touched that governs five lines of my families generation. From grandparents to grand-babies. The easiest way to describe it is-- the enemy has placed assignments on my bloodline for who even knows how long. This spans from decades of abuse in most-- if not all--forms that seemed to keep repeating over and over with each new generation.

My story talks about this from my own experience as a girl up until roughly eight or so years ago. I have experienced physical, emotional, sexual, and mental trauma most of my life and--on many different occasions. In many instances, I thought most of it was perfectly normal yet, knowing deep down inside there must be a better way. I remember thinking, I wish I was normal because normal people could cope with life far better than I could. I often felt that something was deeply wrong with me. This was the 4th grade me, who didn’t realize that in my terms of “most” I was looking at people, that had not endured what was occurring and--had occurred most of my life. 

I gave my life to Jesus as a girl, but didn't realize until YEARS later the profound impact of the ultimate changes of my path would be based on this vital and literally life-saving decision. It was not until my painful past was attempting to replay with my own children, that a true consensus needed to be made no matter the cost and WHAT A COST it was! I am eternally grateful for Jesus, and owe him absolutely everything!!

I have seen first-hand unexplainable miracles in my life, and the very fact that I am even alive today is most definitely one of them! I have been raped, beaten, molested, mocked, and tormented all before the age of seven. Many of these instances happened other times even after this. I tried drugs for the first time at fourteen, and this was given to me by my momma. I also became a momma, right after my seventeenth birthday to a beautiful set of twins, that I couldn’t afford to care for.

With the deepest heart-felt intentions--I place them in their paternal grandparents home while, I served in the US Army--not knowing the real intents of these two people that I loved deeply. They did unspeakable things to my twins for the first few years of their lives. They wouldn't even let me have them back, and I had to fight for several years in court--with almost every spare dime, that I could muster to get my boys away from them. I never understood why until several years later.

There was a sick, dark, and sinister plan unfolding in my children’s lives that I didn’t even know was there. It was not until my precious daughter, Hope, had the courage at the very young age of three to tell me. The rest is in the book however, I can tell you this much, our story is NOT just our story, it's MANY people's stories. God has done such a work in my life and in the lives of my children, that the ripple effect has now spilled outside the doors of our home on to other family members such as, my siblings and parents and many others.

God has broken these curses all of them that included: pedophilia, rape, poverty, abandonment, abuse, word curses, and many others. He has HEALED my mind, body and spirit. He has HEALED my children. He has HEALED my relationship with my parents and YES--even with these grandparents that did this to my children. My heart and mind has been HEALED in Jesus name!! ALL THINGS are possible for those who love Him, believe in Him, and are called according to HIS will. Who the Son sets free TRULY is free indeed, don’t for a second just think that, KNOW IT!

Our story is a story of REAL hope that the LIVING God cares, and wants to set you free from past and present bondage. He truly wants to HEAL your deepest wounds and we are living breathing proof that it's in fact possible.

The other dynamic of this is that the God of this Universe is PERFECT in duplication. His seeds produce fruit after their own kind. He also gives us the unique ability to comfort others with the same measure He has given to us! If God can set me free from my horrible fallen past and use it to help someone else (which He has and still is HELPING MANY)--then my friend--He can, and will do the same with yours! Hang in there, because Jesus is coming for you and counting on YOUR breakthrough, so you can help many others too! What He has done in my life, He most definitely can in yours! Praise Jesus!!

Ruth Almada's Story on Deception Detection Radio with Kay Carswell


Ruth Almada's Story on David Heavener's Broadcast


Purchase Ruth's Books on the Sites Below

Strength in Scars Book Site 

WESTBOW PRESS (A Division of Thomas Nelson & Zondervan)

Christianbook.com

Amazon

Walmart












Read More
31May

Dr. Missy Hood

"Trust in the Lord with all your heart
and lean not on your own understanding;"  (Proverbs 3:5)


"Sometimes we go through life just living and not knowing where the journey is taking us. We think we know where we are going, but we have little idea as to the plans that God has for us. When we hit those “memorial stones”, do we realize how far He has brought us?"

My name is Missy (Dr. Missy Hood) As a young kid, I was carefree and very happy because I knew I was deeply loved by my family. However, when I was 7 years old—my life became anything but carefree because someone outside of my family started to sexually abuse me, and this was when the darkness started to settle in. The sexual abuse went on for 3 years until I got smart and realized that if I stayed close to my Dad at family functions this perpetrator couldn’t touch me. Even though, the abuse stopped—the darkness didn’t. It was later in life, that I learned the enemy (the devil), was after my prophetic gift, and the gift of loving others. (Some are given the gift of faith, others joy, but I was given the gift of love from birth). The Holy Spirit would teach me that His presence had been instilled in me. To prepare us for the Joel 2:5 Army that God was raising up for these end times.

(Joel 2:5) "With a noise like chariots
Over mountaintops they leap,
Like the noise of a flaming fire that devours the stubble,
Like a strong people set in battle array."

It was about 41 years ago, that you would have seen me as just some “tom boy”, who was struggling with life. I was struggling with learning due to severe A.D.H.D/Dyslexia. Also, at a young age, I felt like a walking radio tower because everyday I would find myself knowing things about people and saw many visions. I now know that this is a prophetic gift, and God was calling me to be a prophetess. I had such an amazing Faith and I would tell my parents—“Mom/Dad, God is going to give me such and such and it would come to be.” This was to their amazement, because we did not have much money and they could not afford what I was asking for, but God would provide every time!  So, I learned to DREAM BIG from the start and my family watched as God would take me into even bigger dreams. However, in the meantime I was still trying to understand all this and process what God was doing in me. 

Then my life, because of the abuse, would start to spiral out of control due to bulimia and drinking. These became the two ways that I used to control my body when I was in pain. I started to spiral out of control up to the age of 22 years old. That would be the year when my entire life would fall on it’s headthe day the enemy took my only protection that I had known—My Father died! It was this day, that my Dad went down into a field to cut wood on a family outing and died instantly of an aneurysm. I was the only one that wasn’t there for him. I had been out partying the night before with my boyfriend, doing drugs, drinking, doing all the things my Christian family had raised me not to do. Up to this point, I didn't really know God. I knew Him in my prayers, but to truly know Himthis would be the beginning of my journey on October 31, 1987.

At this point, I felt overloaded, frustrated, beginning to develop a drinking problem, had a eating disorder, and felt SO STUCK in life. I was ANGRY SO ANGRY at God for the loss of my Dad/my protector from all the perpetrators of life, and it was all gone! So now was the time when I had to learn to defend myself.

"In life, when you have the gift of loveyou live life to the fullest until it overflows EVEN ifyou live it wrongly. You do everything to the extreme because that’s the nature of true love. To love and live life DEEPLY, and everyone around me saw it in me as I was self-destructing."

When I was 26 years old, I broke up with my boyfriend and enrolled in college. decided it was time to go back to school and start learning about my God, the God I had only known about in my prayers. I felt love calling me back to Him, my truest sense of self, and I started having this unbelievable drawing to help people. I actually had it since I was 8 years old, because at that point, I was a year into the abuse, and maybe I felt like no one was there to help me. My Dad tried because he knew something was wrong, but he didn’t know what the problem was. A year later, God would allow me to walk in heaven to tell him “goodbye for now” as I would hear my Dad tell me, “God’s going to use you to help bring the Glory/Love back into His Church. Life just kept moving me onward after that. 

For a long time, I had this HUGE dream of designing in HollywoodBIG faith that kept telling me “Move to HollywoodTHAT will be your ticket out of the pain and then, you can BE SOMEBODY!” So I got my BA in design and spent the next 28 years designing for college & church live productions. I handled budgets up to $150,000.00 for choir and show costuming. Sometimes making theatrical costumes ranging up to $5000.00 (for Mi Mi Rogers on the film Stop Loss). What propelled me into film occurred after our million dollar production the “Austin Christmas Pageant” which I designed for yearly for about 4 years. 

In the 4th year, I would find myself standing in the middle of a room full of pastors when my choir director would spin around in front of over 500 people telling me, “Missy, we’re going to pray for you! We’re going to pray for you to design for churches!” To which I quickly spun around telling him “DON’T YOU DARE! I’M GOING TO HOLLYWOOD!” I felt a sadness in my heart as I felt like I was declining the Lord's invitation of what He was offering me. As I left the show wrap party that nightI heard a voice say to me: “OK, if this is what you “think” you want to do, I’ll let you chase this dream that you think is of Me, but I’m going to visit you in a while and we are going on a journey.” I thought the conversation was strange, but dismissed it as quickly as it had come, and I was off to pursue my own dreams of design and fame, the thing I thought would give me identity and value. Little did I know, the only way to find identity was through My Father in Heavena lesson I would later learn. I spent the next 10 years, designing on huge movie sets for Paramount and Warner Brothers films such as the “Gunman & Stop Loss” with Mi Mi Rogers (Austin Powers Movie), Sean Patrick Flannery, Joey Lauren Adams (Big Daddy with Adam Sandler), Cerin Hines, Ryan Phillipe & Cerin Hines (Tinker Tailor Solder Spy). God has allowed me to meet so many stars, and be connected to all the fame in the world, but even that never settled my soul. It wasn’t until I walked into a set trailer one day and said out loud, “I hate this job!”that I realized that this wasn’t my passion. HOWEVER, designing came naturally to me while learning academics DID NOT (because of my severe A.D.H.D). I had tried to work in the working world for years (outside of design/arts), and I wound up losing 40 jobs in 15 years because of the way I learned. I was at this place in my life where I was unsatisfied, very broken, and knew I needed a new life. I had gotten so far away from my Christian roots that I lost myself, and the purest sense of knowing what love really is. Hence, just like the voice had told me years earlier, “I’m going to come for you and take you on a journey", MY REAL JOURNEY BEGAN! I left the film industry and began to pursue what I felt what was God's plan for me.

God connected me into prophetic ministries where He would use me to minister to people non-stop in Austin, New York, and New Jersey. I began to face one of my biggest fears of obtaining a Master's Degree in Occupational Education. My Thesis was written to help those suffering with A.D.D., A.D.H.D, and other learning disabilities. My Thesis earned me awards and was the ticket that would get me invited into the Ph.D. program. 

At this point, I called out to God and said, I want to help your people, and inspire your warriors, intercessors, and Front Runnersthose called to battle at the front lines for the body of Christ. During this time, God was teaching me a NEW WAY TO PRAY, and to wield His sword with such agility & strategy for high level warriors. He’s raising up a special regiment of warriors. (Joel 2:5) These warriors have been primed by fire from the onslaughts of the enemy and persevered through the pain and struggles of life. 

We are now in a season where God is teaching us how to stand back up to where we KNOW the way in which we are to walk. We’ve been raised up out of the pain of the past, to where we now use the past as a platform upward to help others learn how to climb their mountains. Church Reformer Leaders that are preparing the end-time Army for such a time as this! Teaching them how to maneuver through the 4 contraction points of the year (the birthing of Jesus Christ) through His remnant so that, we can be the LOYAL, HONORING bride He meant for us to be. Think about it! Would you ever “befriend or date/OR EVEN MARRY, anyone who dishonored, or betrayed you? Absolutely NOT! Neither would God! So, why should we think He would accept any less from us? He's demanding a pure spotless bride, a bride that is truly ON FIRE for Him, passionately in love (in the spirit) to where we can show others how to get back into the “real deal!” Back into His spiritlike we once walked as a society, but at deeper levels. Back into truth & love the way God always meant for us to walk in.


Blessings,

Dr. Missy Hood

 Visit Dr. Missy Hood's site by clicking on her name below.


Click on Dr. Missy's YouTube Channel "Ezekiel's Wheel" below. 


Click on book photo below to purchase Dr. Missy Hood's book on:

Click on book photo below to purchase Dr. Missy Hood's book on: 

Dr. Missy Hood's Family Lineage Video






 


Read More
25Nov

``1George Carneal, was raised in the Bible Belt, by a Southern Baptist minister. Throughout his school years, he was tormented with physical and verbal abuse. George was called a queer, faggot, and a homo. While heterosexual peers dated, he spent 12 lonely years yearning to be loved by a man. Eventually, he turned his back on God, the church, and fully immersed himself in the queer culture. George learned firsthand, that there are many struggles in a religious world at odds with, and often hostile toward, homosexuals.


"As far as the east is from the west, So far has He removed our transgressions from us."  (Psalms 103:12)

George Carneal -- Author, Speaker, Singer/Songwriter


I’m a Baptist minister’s son who grew up in church and gave my life to Christ when I was seven years old. I also struggled with a same-sex attraction. Living in Tennessee, in the Bible Belt, in the 70’s, homosexuality wasn’t a topic I heard about unless some random person was making a derogatory comment about “fags.” 


All through school I was tormented with physical and verbal abuse with one guy threatening to slit my throat. Being called a queer, faggot, homo, I didn’t understand how my peers were able to identify something about me that I hadn’t been unable to understand and come to terms with myself. This was confusing.


At church, the pain was compounded by the inevitable sermons on Sodom & Gomorrah. I felt condemned by God for something I didn’t ask for. On the inside I was filled with rage and told God I hated Him. I suffered in silence.


While heterosexual peers dated, I spent 12 lonely years yearning to be loved by a man. A random encounter with a guy out of high school confirmed this is who I was…a homosexual. Shortly after this encounter, my father was relocated to a church in Florida.


Not long after the move, I ran into a guy who invited me to a local gay bar. Walking into a bar filled with attractive men was overwhelming and exciting. I finally found a “home” where I wasn’t being bullied, could be myself, and be around other guys like me. I craved affection from guys and became promiscuous.

 

Since countless “loving Christians” insisted that God destroyed Sodom & Gomorrah because of vile perverts like me, that God created AIDS to kill queers, and that I was destined to burn in Hell, I believed that maybe God does hate me. So, I turned my back on God, the church, and fully immersed myself in the queer culture.


Sadly, after three years in the gay life, I was masking the pain with drugs and alcohol. Pornography became a part of my life, I developed a sex addiction, became a hustler (a male prostitute), struggled with depression, suicidal thoughts, and eventually attempted suicide. I felt no hope. 


My journey would eventually lead me to Nashville where I met a guy, we became boyfriends, and moved to Los Angeles. I secured a job in the music industry.


After seven years, we broke up because I was still tormented and struggling with my faith and sexuality. I longed to be in church and eventually found a church home. I was filled with constant anxiety for fear that these Christians would discover my secret.


After church I cruised adult bookstores and bars because I was so hungry for affection and love. Random encounters meant quick sex, but I didn’t care…it was a brief moment of feeling desired by a guy. I couldn’t see it at the time, but I was searching for something to fill a void in my life. I had yet to comprehend that Jesus was the answer.


After a mild confrontation with a deacon over rumors regarding my sexuality, I left the church and found a gay-affirming church with a homosexual pastor. Surely, I would find the answers and come to accept that God made me this way. The turmoil was still there. Unable to find concrete answers, I left that church.


Working in the music business, I had the chance to meet and be around countless celebrities/rock stars/movie stars. In our celebrity-obsessed culture, many believe that fame and fortune will bring happiness. However, some celebrities weren’t that pleasant to be around and appeared to be just as unhappy as I was. I personally knew miserable people with immense wealth. It was clear.  Money and fame doesn’t bring happiness.  


I extended my search into the occult, new age and Hindu arenas hoping to find different paths to get to God. I still yearned for Him even though I wasn’t sure He wanted anything to do with me. I had no desire to serve Satan but wondered if God was holding out on information that Satan was willing to impart. Could I get to God through a supernatural means?  


Casting love spells seemed appealing...as I desperately wanted a man to love me, but something in my spirit...compelled me, not to open that door so I didn’t. I spent countless hours in new age/occult/psychic bookstores, browsing through various books on “world religions”, while waiting to have my tarot cards read by psychics. I was desperate for answers yet became cynical when all they could provide was vague information about relationships and financial issues that could be applied to anyone. 


The New Age emphasis on sacrificing ourselves for the good of mankind, fighting darkness that was consuming the world, appealed to me. The search for “ascended masters” to become more enlightened intensified….with no luck.


Attending a Hindu temple in Hollywood, the “teacher” read from sacred Hindu texts, even God’s Word. While Jesus was respected as a great teacher, He was also equal with other Hindu gurus. That was unsettling. No matter how confused I was, something was settled within me that Jesus was God’s Son and no one compared to Him. I also knew idols had no power and I certainly wasn’t going to bow down and worship them.


Additionally, the new age and Hindu (even Buddhist) teachings regarding reincarnation were distressing. My current life was one of misery. The thought of being reincarnated, coming back to live many lives over and over and over in order to become perfect, striving to reach moksha (Hinduism)/nirvana (Buddhism), without any knowledge of past mistakes in order to do better in the next life, brought about more despair. 


Deep within me, I knew Jesus was the one, all-sufficient Savior who paid for my sins on the Cross.  Instead of me having to do the work, Jesus did the work and that comforted me. God confirms that we live once, and then...the judgement (Hebrews 9:27).  I eventually, rejected the Occult/New Age/Hindu teachings.


I wanted a relationship with God, but I didn’t want to be around Christians. I hated them. Church was a place of anxiety for me. The thought of attending church was like going into the lion’s den.


Disillusioned with life, one night I drove to a Christian bookstore in Long Beach. I searched for books on suicide, but from a biblical perspective. After one failed suicide attempt, I was ready to try again. However, I feared God would send me to Hell for taking my life. Suicidal thoughts were as common as what I thought about eating each day. The depression was brutal. I cried all the time. The voices in my head tormented me. I needed peace. Finding nothing on the subject, I sat on the floor and cried.


I went back to the bars and slept with men in order to mask the pain, the loneliness, only to struggle with constant heartache as I desperately searched for love.


Sitting at a dive bar in Hollywood one night...(among the prostitutes, hustlers, former jailbirds, drag queens, kids tossed out of homes because they were queer, women whose wrinkled faces revealed difficult lives, and old gay men getting drunk at the bar)...I faced the cold, harsh reality of life. This could be me. My heart hurt for those people. During this time, I was unable to share how much God loved them by what Jesus did on the Cross because, I couldn’t see it for myself thanks to mean-spirited “Christians”. I was a vile homosexual. I had no hope yet something had to change. I couldn’t do this any longer.


A television commercial from a local church advertised a Bible Study on the book of Genesis. I felt led to contact them and spent two years attending that Bible study. I hungered for God and enjoyed studying His Word. My view of God started to change. I eventually started to see that God didn’t hate me. He hated my sin. There was hope that I could have a relationship with God! I also met Christians who truly had the heart of Christ as I slowly immersed myself back into the church.


God eventually led me to a Baptist church through a retired pastor. The current pastor moved to have a class for LGBT individuals. I was excited because I would now have a safe place to meet others struggling with this issue. Unfortunately, the pastor and teachers were moving us in the direction of “Being gay is OK, we’re under Grace, God created you that way” and I was confused.  Scripture is clear we are not to abuse God’s Grace (Romans 6:1-2; 14-15).


I had heard numerous stories of LGBT individuals whom God was bringing out of that life so I was perplexed as to why the pastor/teachers were pushing us into that life. I was now more confused. I was mentally and emotionally exhausted dealing with this issue, especially when I didn’t ask for these feelings! 


I sat in my car so many times and cried, banging the steering wheel, yelling at God, begging Him for an answer, for peace! I often prayed this sincere prayer to God: “If homosexuality is OK in Your eyes, give me peace about it and I trust You will put a good Christian man in my life who will love me. If homosexuality is wrong under all circumstances, give me peace about it, help me to recognize it, and I will still serve You.”


As the months passed, wanting to believe that “gay is OK”, I was still tormented. I said enough and accepted that it was not in God’s will. I left that church, turned my back on the gay life, repented, and truly surrendered my life to Christ. The most amazing thing happened. God gave me what I had longed for my whole life...peace with myself, peace of mind, and finally...peace with God! The issue has been settled and I am no longer tormented in my mind or by my past! (Isaiah 43:25; Psalm 103:12; Romans 8:1)


Numerous LGBT individuals have accepted that homosexuality is not a part of God’s plan. Some LGBT individuals have transitioned successfully into a heterosexual life. Those who still have a same-sex attraction, like myself, have chosen celibacy. We desire to live a life that honors and pleases God. I’ve been on this path for about 12 years now. 


The Apostle Paul asked God to “remove the thorn in his side” and God responded with “My grace is sufficient” (2 Corinthians 12:7-10). If this is to be my thorn, so be it. What matters is that God provided the healing I needed in order to have the strength to walk away from that life. My desire for sex with men no longer controls me!


This journey has been difficult, but I praise God for bringing me though it because I now understand God’s grace and His mercy. There is hope for everyone no matter what your bondage is….drugs, alcohol, food, sex, pornography, even issues of shame, rejection, abuse, rape, guilt of abortion, criminal activities, etc. If one is truly sorry and repents, God’s free gift of salvation is available to anyone who wants it (Romans 6:23). Jesus paid it ALL on the Cross at Calvary when He shed His precious blood for our sin. God desires to have a relationship with you but you must come His Way and that’s through Jesus.  (John 3:16-17; 10:9; 14:6; Acts 4:12; 1 Timothy 2:5). Give your life to Christ today and know real peace. You matter to Him!


Blessings,

George Carneal


Purchase George's book --- Amazon (From Queer to Christ) Available in both Kindle & paperback.  

 

George's Interview on the Homekeepers Show - (Christian Television Network)



Janet Mefferd Today Show



Christian Life Magazine 99.3 FM Interview with host, Chris Rose





Read More
22May

When Kathy was younger, she didn't know God. She was empty, divorced, and a single mom. Kathy's emptiness turned into fulfillment when her life became the Lord's. To her, that's the best decision she has ever made besides marrying her husband Scott.



"Because Your lovingkindness is better than life,
My lips shall praise You."  (Psalms 63:3)




I was raised in a home where my mother and my oldest sister took us to a Lutheran church. I was there for 16 years. I was baptized and confirmed, but I was confused about the true way of salvation. When I went back many years later and looked in the notebooks my father had saved for me, I found the notation, “What is it really like to know God?”


I went on in ignorance, got married when I was 21, and had a son, then my twin girls when I was 30. At that time, I remember thinking to myself that “this is what life is all about.” But, I was also in a marriage that had been split up seven or eight times because of an unfaithful relationship. I began to realize what a mess my life was in. I went to counseling with my minister, and all he had to offer me was a psychology book. Even though I was not saved at the time, I thought it was really odd that a minister would not offer me anything from the Bible, the Word of God. (Note: “salvation”, “saved” and “born again” are biblical terms referring to the forgiveness of sins by God and the rescue of a person from their power and penalty of that sin. This is God’s requirement for everlasting life.)


At the time, I just turned to go my own way. My marriage was broken, and I had no one in my life. I got into the nightclub scene. I loved to dance, and it got so that rock and roll was all I had to uplift me. At the same time, it was my downfall. I went on like this for nearly two years. But my life was empty. Oh, I loved my children, and I got up every day and went out and worked hard to provide a home for them. But it got to a point where I would get up in the morning and look in the mirror and I couldn’t stand myself because I knew something was missing. Something was terribly wrong. About that time, my friend at work started attending an independent Baptist church she had attended as a child. She had just built a house and was trying to fill her life with material things. She began asking me if I’d like to attend church with her, and I didn’t respond at first. But then, the Lord brought another lady to work with me temporarily because she had been injured and couldn’t do her regular job. She began to preach the Word of God to me. Everyone around us abandoned the area when she started witnessing and preaching. I couldn’t leave because this was my job area, but I really would not have wanted to leave. Something drew me to what this woman had to say. She told me in no uncertain terms, that I was a sinner and needed to get saved. She opened her Bible and began to read from the book of John, chapter three, verse 16. I just listened and thought to myself, “Something is clicking here.” While I didn’t really understand everything, it was enough of a nudge for me to seek out my friend and ask her if I could take her up on her offer to take me to church with her.


I got my two year old twins ready that next Sunday morning, and my 10 year old son and we were off for church. I went for two weeks and listened to everything that was being said. The Saturday night before the third Sunday, the Lord opened up my heart and let me see myself for what I was—a sinner destined for hell if I didn’t get saved. I had no peace that night. I knew I had to get alone with God and deal with this. I had read enough of the Bible, the books of John and Romans, to know what I had to do. That Saturday night, May 14th, 1981, I got down on my knees and acknowledged that I was a sinner and asked the Lord to come into my heart and change my life.


The next day I couldn’t wait to get to church. Even though my children were there with me, I felt like there was no one around me. I was convinced that those who were there could see my sin because the message so pointed at me. During the invitation for people to come forward and get to know Christ as their personal Savior, I literally ran up the aisle. I was weeping as I told the usher that the Lord had come into my heart the night before, and I said that I so wanted my family to be saved also. The Lord was so good to me, and I praise Him for that.


I continued living in Baltimore. About 1983, things began to change at Western Electric, where I had worked for 17 years. I felt I was being pulled in the wrong direction, and I prayed to God to remove me from that atmosphere. Little did I know that I would be moved to another state.


I was offered a job at the Western Electric plant in Allentown, PA. It was a big decision for me. I went to my ex-husband to see if that door might still be open for me. After talking to him, I knew that chapter of my life was closed, and I jumped right into finding a new life in Pennsylvania.


My sister lived with me in Allentown for a couple of years until she retired in 1988 and moved back to Baltimore. I was pretty lonely after that. I worked with both men and women at Western Electric, and I had a number of men come up to me and ask me out. But, I had promised myself that I would not get involved with an ungodly man.


So, I began to pray to God. I told God I didn’t know if I even had a right to ask Him for a husband, but that I was lonely and I would like to have a man that would lead and guide and direct my children. I asked for a man that reads the Bible and a man that would want to sit and have family devotions and share God’s Word with his family. I asked for a man with whom I could have a spiritual relationship, as well as good fellowship.


I believe God gave me that man when He brought Scott Wilson into my life. Our marriage has not been without problems. We all have problems. But we can always get down on our hands and knees and ask God for guidance and direction. For me, sometimes, that has meant I’ve had to go to my husband and ask him to forgive me for trying to lead the family. After being a single mother making all decisions for so long, I found that sometimes I have a tendency to be independent.


At those time, I find it a comfort to turn to the Bible and read the book of Ephesians, chapter five, verses 21 to 25, “Submitting yourselves one to another in the fear of God. Wives, submit yourselves unto your own husbands, as unto the Lord. For the husband is the head of the wife, even as Christ is the head of the church: and he is the savior of the body. Therefore as the church is subject unto Christ, so let the wives be to their own husbands in everything. Husbands, love your wives, even as Christ also loved the church, and gave himself for it.” That helps me remember what a true Christian home is like under Christ. I find if I submit myself first unto the Lord, then unto my husband, most times everything just falls in place. That’s the advice I would give to any young woman just starting out in her married life.


Kathy and her husband Scott (Very cute in matching colors)

Read More
03May

Through years of physical and emotional abuse, Surya Nycole, has allowed God to use all that she has gone through for His glory. Today, she has a recovery ministry helping others overcome their life trauma's. Surya is also a worship leader, speaker, and author. Please take some time to listen to Surya's videos. They will encourage you and those you love and care for.



(Mark 8:34-38)   "Then he called the crowd to him along with his disciples and said: “Whoever wants to be my disciple must deny themselves and take up their cross and follow me. For whoever wants to save their life will lose it, but whoever loses their life for me and for the gospel will save it. What good is it for someone to gain the whole world, yet forfeit their soul? Or what can anyone give in exchange for their soul? If anyone is ashamed of me and my words in this adulterous and sinful generation, the Son of Man will be ashamed of them when he comes in his Father’s glory with the holy angels.”


God uses us! Even in the midst of our sin, our pain, and especially in our sorrow. He uses ALL things for good, not only for those that are hurting, but also for those doing the hurting. Today, I am going to encourage you with one of my many testimonies of how God carried me through, healed me, and helped me grow in my relationship with Him!

It’s no secret that I am a single mother—I never married my son’s father however—my pregnancy was a medical miracle. In the past, I had many woman issues that left my ovaries scarred, and even experienced cancer scares that brought on several surgeries which took half of my cervix. My odds of pregnancy became 50/50—50% chance I would get pregnant, and 50% chance that I would get pregnant, but with extremely high odds of not carrying full-term or miscarrying. I left that appointment filled with sorrow—grieving my dreams of becoming a mother. I knew God, but as any immature Christian, I believed I didn’t deserve to be healed and/or blessed, and that I was the one in control. I began to gather paperwork to start the adoption process for a special needs child and MY plan was to mail it out on my 30th birthday. But even in the midst of my sin, God had a different plan!


Unmarried and in an unstable relationship, I became pregnant in December 2009. Needless to say—I had a high risk pregnancy. I was excited to become a mother, but I feared losing my baby, especially knowing that I did not become pregnant in a way that pleased God. The father of my child was in and out of my life, coming back with temporary positive gestures that sometimes lasted only a few hours. Often he would leave after horrible actions of cheating and verbal abuse. I was about 4 months pregnant, when I prayed about getting back together with my son’s father. God showed me two roads that I could chose to take—The first road would lead to a dark and heavy-hearted path with a terrifying forest—The second road would be breathtaking, beautifully bright, and like open and clean fresh air. While God showed me the 2 choices that I could take—I chose the dark path. I wanted my child to have a family—I’m sure you are thinking—Why didn’t you choose the sunny road!?!? But, I had already had years of false Biblical teaching at this point and in my mind, I was going to do whatever it took for us to be a family even though, his father was abusive, struggling with substance abuse, and would cheat—I thought I could fix it all!


At the time, I became pregnant, I was a worship leader. Yes, even those in ministry struggle with their flesh. I was in serious emotional pain and confusion, but I led worship every Sunday and I praised God! This is truly where I deeply learned how to praise Him during the storm, and let me tell you—I praised Him! I never missed a Sunday—I kept moving forward and put on a smile that I call “Gods smile”, because without Him, it would not exist!


About a month after I had my son, his father became physically violent on top of all the verbal abuse. He didn’t want to be home, sober or faithful. Every weekend, I obtained a new bruise to replace the one that faded from the time before. His face would literally change and I saw Satan in his eyes. In the midst of Satan trying to break me down, I got right back up. Literally, he would throw me across the room, and I would just stand right back up. I didn’t hit back, I just kept getting back up to face him. Maybe it was a mistake, because it angered him even more, and made the situation worse. But, I had been in abusive relationships in the past where others often blamed me for not standing up for myself. I didn’t know what to do, but I knew I wasn’t going to just lay there anymore.


Well, yep—even 6 months later—I still wanted my family to work, but the abuse continued to get worse, and as it did— I did my best to hide what was truly going on in my life. It did help that he wasn’t home much though. Months after the birth of my son, I started going to therapy because he started making me believe that I was crazy and needed help. I sure did need help, but not the kind of help he expected. I didn’t admit to the physical abuse because I knew my therapist would have to report it, and—I was beginning to believe, that I provoked it, therefore—in some way, felt I deserved the way I was being treated. My therapist was a Christian woman, and she helped me see that I shouldn't blame myself because it wasn’t my fault. It took me about 2 more months to kick him out for good—not because of therapy, but because my son got hurt. Most of the time I got hit, my son was in his bedroom, or—I wasn’t holding him at the time when his father became violent. However, this time—he pushed me hard while, I was holding him and his 6th month old little head, flew into the door, leaving a bump that swelled. My thinking at this point was, “It’s one thing for me to be abused—I can take—but for my son to get hurt, it is not OK!” It was extremely difficult because no matter how much you don’t like being abused, you’re so messed up mentally you don’t know up from down. But, I kicked him out and got an order of protection. It has been almost 8 years since that day.  


Unfortunately, we still have to deal with him, but thankfully—it’s from a distance. He still continues to struggle with his flesh, and we continue to pray for him. He’s not very involved father which, is a blessing because he’s not healthy enough even to be a part-time father. I forgave his father years ago, while I was still healing, because it’s not about how I feel—that’s the key to growing spiritually. I want my son to know God is the reason for the path that we are on in life. With all my heart, I want him to know God the way I have come to know Him, so he doesn’t waste his life floating through the world encountering or causing pain because of his own pain or confusion.


God has taught me that forgiveness is not only for me, but also for my abusers. He showed me how they were at one-time victims too. I have learned such a depth of forgiveness with understanding that I never knew before. God has given me strength to realize why I got into abusive relationships. He has healed me, and now uses me to help others! All of the evil that I have encountered, and participated in—He now uses for the good of strengthening me spiritually and others! Today, I not only minister to my son, but also to those in recovery from all kinds of traumas. He uses me as a mind, body, and soul coach to all. He has given me the ability to relate in ways that many cannot. This trial was painful on many levels, but it brought me closer to God, has become part of my purpose, and is one of my favorite testimonies!



Surya's Facebook    LinkedIn    YouTube Videos

Suryanycole@gmail.com






Read More