Blog #Healing

How I Overcame the Storm of Depression

  Dawn-Marie Woroniak

“And they have overcome him by the blood of the Lamb and by the word of their testimony” (Revelation 12:11)

For most of my life, I have struggled with depression . . . a dark and hopeless place that was numbed by binge drinking when it became too much for me to handle. At the time, I thought it would help ease the pain of the emotional and physical abuse that had occurred during childhood. At an early age, I became insecure, lonely, depressed, and a perfectionist . . . all in the hopes of overcoming, but never overcame.

Even after saying “yes” to Jesus, I struggled with binge drinking. Knowing, that I needed help, I began to receive counseling. Unfortunately, within a couple of appointments, I would convince myself that I was okay, only to discover the harsh reality that I was not—a cycle that lasted longer than it should have because of my stubbornness and unwillingness to work through the pain. Working through pain brings healing, but at the time I was not cooperating with God’s healing plan for me. Condemnation and shame consumed me. After all, how could I be a Christian and still struggle like I was? I doubted God’s forgiveness because of the prison I kept myself in. God gave me the keys to break free when I said “yes” to Him but in my absolute foolishness . . . I did not use them. In essence, I was oblivious to the free gift of salvation He had given me.

During my healing process, I have learned that God has a very good sense of humor. At times, when God calls us . . . it can be in the “midst” of our pain and darkness. For it is in the “midst” of things that God shows up in greatness!

When He called me to write VictoryEmbraced . . . I was not only cleaning dishes . . . I was still in the “midst” of struggling with depression. However, I now know I have God’s DNA . . . and because of this, I will always be victorious!

While collecting testimonies for the book, I began to experience symptoms of PMDD (Premenstrual Dysphoric Disorder), which is a major mental depressive disorder and has a few extra edges than regular PMS, occurring only in 3 to 8 percent of women. I have been told many times that I am unique . . . not only in my sense of humor but also in how I process and see things in life. Now there is indisputable evidence that what has been said for years is true! Yep, this definitely proved it . . . not only to myself but also to those closest to me.

PMDD usually makes its ugly appearance in women who are in their late 30s or mid-40s. Mine showed up when I was 36. With all the hormone shifts, I also started having simple partial seizures, which are rarely noticed by others. They begin with a feeling of deja vu followed by staring that can last a few minutes.

In my potential for perfectionism, I happen to have all of the symptoms of PMDD . . . not just the four or five that classify the disorder and help to make a diagnosis. Symptoms of PMDD include anxiety and a feeling of being on edge, memory issues, severe mood swings, crying for no reason, extreme sensitivity to abandonment and rejection, anger and increased conflict with the ones you love, decreased interest in usual activities, feelings of being overwhelmed as well as feeling out of control, joint and muscle pain, weight gain, insomnia, and headaches. Yes, a long list of symptoms, but nothing God cannot handle. Sometimes one month can be worse than another. During the more intense months, I pray for it to be over quickly and at times have felt as if I am holding on to Him for dear life. I had a neurologist for the seizures, which were under control with medicine, and after two years of being seizure-free, my doctor began lowering the dosage successfully. My psychiatrist was to help take the edge off of the PMDD. Through it all, I have the most renowned doctor in the world by my side overseeing things . . . my sweet and precious Jesus. 

I learned that there are things one can do to help relieve the symptoms of PMDD such as hormone therapy, taking nutritional supplements, antidepressants, exercise, and drinking less caffeine. My hardest to follow through on is eating less chocolate, cheese, and carbohydrates. Yes, it is true. . . sometimes chocolate is a girl’s best friend.

I have learned that with any disorder—not only in my life but with others as well—there is hope because God has the power to take any disorder and create order out of a total mess, He can create beauty. And because I have learned the character of God and who He says He is, I have absolute faith that He will provide the avenues for my healing even if that means He balances all my hormones through early menopause. A miracle in itself! I do not put anything past God . . . He can do all things! Being in the process of healing does not mean failure because obtaining victory is a continuous motion of moving forward.

We are a work in progress . . . always under construction. With God, seven months of intense counseling has helped transform my life. I have learned to put God first in all I do . . . and to depend on Him for all I need. I am blessed to have a very loving husband who has been supportive, understanding, and patient with me along my journey of Embracing Victory Over the Storm of Depression.

VictoryEmbraced Ministries 

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Buddy The Butterfly Children's Book  Teaches priceless Christ-centered lessons about the incredible life cycle of the butterfly. Available on Amazon, Barnes & Noble, iTunes, and ReaderHouse in hardcover, paperback & ebook.

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Dawn-Marie is the author and founder of the VictoryEmbraced Testimonial Blog and recently published her first children's book, Buddy The Butterfly, which teaches priceless Christ-centered lessons about the incredible life cycle of the butterfly. Through the years, Dawn-Marie has written original inspirational quotes that are being created into unique designs so you can share the Good News of Jesus wherever you go.  VictoryEmbraced spreads the message of hope, faith, encouragement, and the Gospel through powerful testimonies. If you would like your testimony to be considered for the VictoryEmbraced Blog and an interview on a broadcast, we would love to hear from you! 

Please use the contact form on the VictoryEmbraced ministry site.

The third born of three and only daughter in my family, I am an out-going, funny, joy-filled lover of people. I love to teach and interact with others. I have taught at the college level for over 20 years; taught junior church at my local congregation for about 15 years; and a youth group for high school and college age students. I currently lead a women’s group which encourages us to find and move forward into our God-given passions and purpose. What most people don’t know is that I suffered from low self-esteem for much of my life. People who know me now would be shocked to hear me say this. By listening and watching me speak, most would think I’ve never had a problem with confidence. Just the opposite is actually the truth.

This is because I grew up in a dysfunctional home where my father was an alcoholic. When he wouldn’t come home after work, we knew he was at the local bar drinking. My mother, two brothers and I would spend the evening with a knot in our stomachs. We never knew when he would come through the door but we knew it wasn’t going to be pleasant when he did. I went to bed scared many nights. My father never physically abused me, but those of you that have suffered verbal/emotional abuse know that this leaves scars as well. My father would become physical sometimes with my brothers and mom. I don’t remember ever sleeping through the night if I went to bed when my father was still at the bar. He was loud, angry, and cussing when he would return home. Often he would make my brothers get up and out of bed. I would lie in my own bed listening, worried for my brothers. He usually just opened the door of my room and swore at me as I pretended to be asleep. Besides speaking words to me that I cannot imagine uttering as a parent, my father never seemed to have any use for me. I did not feel valued by him in the least.

These types of nights weren’t the only thing that caused me to be nervous as a kid growing up. I felt the need to keep all of this from my friends. It is not an easy secret to hide when you live in a small town. What would my friends think if they knew? I was convinced their parents would put an end to our friendship if they knew what went on inside my home. I felt ashamed for having a father who drank and acted the way he did. I was in elementary school when I realized the way my dad treated us was not “normal” compared to what I witnessed at my friend’s homes.

I will be forever grateful for one of these homes I was invited to for a neighborhood Christian kid’s club. I attended every day for a week when I was in 5^th grade. The gospel was shared with us through stories each day. I remember on the last day having the opportunity to invite Jesus into my heart. I had never heard the “Good News” before. Though I had been baptized in a Lutheran church as a baby, we had never attended church since moving to Michigan when I was six years old. Little did I know that day when I raised my hand while all heads were bowed, and prayed the prayer of salvation, that my life would be changed from that moment on. But, that is exactly what happened.

The challenges in my life did not magically disappear but everything felt different. I knew I was not alone. I knew there was someone to help me get through the challenges. I knew there was hope for my future. I asked my mom to buy me a Bible and she got me a teen version of the Living Bible. This was so easy to understand and had devotional type readings throughout. I devoured the Word like someone receiving water in the desert. Looking back at my life I see so many answers to my first prayers. God had a specific plan for my life and he has been so faithful leading me along my life’s journey. Each chapter has built upon the last. In this season, I am being used as a Christian life coach and speaker to bless others. As God would have it, I end up being blessed as well. It is exhilarating teaching and encouraging others to step into their purpose for this season in their life. I am so humbled when God uses me to help someone identify and move past what has them “stuck” in one area or another. This includes facilitating inner healing for past wounds at times, or helping someone re-wire their brain so that worrisome, negative thoughts don’t hold them back. I am discovering God puts us in community with others so that we can all keep moving forward in His plan for us.

Back in 5^th grade, the same family that invited me to the Christian kid’s club, started bringing me with them to church. It was a Bible teaching, evangelical church where I soaked up truths about God like a sponge. Though I strayed somewhat in high school, I still read my Bible every night. I know now that Jesus never left me, but just patiently waited for me to turn back towards him, which I did when I found promises in His Word that I couldn’t deny. I remember thinking, "Why am I making choices that go against God's Word when...I could be living for Him completely, and receiving ALL the blessings He promises?" I had no mentor or adult helping me come to this conclusion, but I’m convinced people somewhere were praying for me. John 14, is what He used to get my attention. The whole chapter is full of promises, but my teenage heart really soared at the truth of verse 13, “And whatsoever ye shall ask in my name, that will I do, that the Father may be glorified in the Son”. Truthfully, this verse still makes my heart soar. I now know the power the Comforter promised in this chapter. I know how to listen, be taught by, and receive the peace offered by God’s Spirit. I understand that God intends to do life together with us and that his plan is above and beyond anything we can imagine.

When I was a young college student God started the process of supernatural inner healing for my childhood wounds. I came to the revelation that the way my father treated me was more about him than me. I understood that my father was broken inside and probably full of self-loathing.  Though I don’t know what events or circumstances played a part in my father’s brokenness, God taught me that hurt people, hurt others. God cultivated a compassion in my heart for my father and I was able to forgive him. When I look back now, I realize this is nothing short of a miracle for God to give me so much grace to act maturely at this young age. This was such a blessing because the last three years of my father’s life we became closer than we had ever been. I had finished my undergraduate degree and got married a few years before my father was diagnosed with cancer. He stopped drinking and underwent surgery and treatments. The next three years, was a roller-coaster of emotions. He would respond well to a treatment, and we would all be filled with hope only to have the treatment stop responding several months down the road. Up and down we went, but I am so grateful for the time I and my husband had to spend with him and my mother. We enjoyed time together doing fun things like playing cards, going to movies, and eating good food. My dad was fun! Who knew? He absolutely loved my husband, and I felt like my father was proud of the woman I was becoming. I cherish the memories from this season and am so thankful I chose forgiveness over bitterness.

How could I not forgive my father when my heavenly Father forgives every one of my sins beginning back in 5^th grade? I knew full well that Jesus had paid the price for not just my sins but my father’s sins, as well. I am confident that my father is in heaven because he was able to receive this great gift. This isn’t to say I haven’t had to deal with some issues throughout my life. I explain in my upcoming e-book, how all our experiences throughout life make us believe things. Unfortunately, a lot of the time the things we believe are lies!  The tricky thing is, when we believe a lie, we don’t realize it’s a lie because we believe it! I love helping people uncover these lies and receive healing like I did myself. When my own father didn’t value me, I believed the lie that no one else would. Why would anyone find value in what I taught or shared? How convenient it would have been for satan if I had continued to believe this. He could have stolen my calling, my voice, and my purpose, but that wasn’t my story. Healing and re-wiring our brains is a continual process, and I am ever so grateful to God for allowing me to be a part of people's spiritual growth and healing.  

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"For God has not given us a spirit of fear, but of power and of love and of a sound mind."                        (2 Timothy 1:7)

David L. Winters

Although, I accepted Christ in adolescence, the wounds of my childhood left indelible marks on my heart. My motto as a government procurement manager: "Never let them see you sweat". Rising quickly through the civilian ranks of the Navy, I reached the highest general schedule grade at age 34. On the outside, I’m told that I looked confident, intelligent and funny.

On the inside, I felt driven to accomplish as much as possible. Though ambitious and eager, fear became my constant companion. Frankly, I didn’t know the basis for most of my fears. High places, including flying in airplanes could be overcome with a pill, and carrying my Bible with me on the trip. Fear of public speaking could be managed with intense preparation and to-die-for graphics in my presentation slide deck.

Although, a strong man on the outside, the pain inside became almost unbearable. In my forties, panic attacks appeared out of nowhere. Now working in Washington, D.C. for the Department of Homeland Security, my daily routine included going in and out of controlled facilities. Keycards, elevator control cards, physical keys and microchips all had a part in my daily life. One day, I had to fight with myself to get on an elevator to go to an important meeting.

At the large conference room table, the meeting had just begun when I thought I was having a heart attack. To make a long story short, I scared everyone to death and found out it wasn’t a heart attack. God had a plan to change my life.

Over several months, He showed me that I must quit my job and spend time with Him in prayer. Everyone thought, that I was even crazier when I quit my secure government job just six years short of retirement to take a sabbatical. I didn’t know how long it would last or what would happen. I just quit working and started spending all day, every day with God and occasionally a few close friends.

The result was an amazing transformation! By reading the Bible, praying and studying more than twenty books, God relieved me of my underlying fears and gave me confidence to return to work. I learned that the purpose of my life was not to get ahead, but to serve my employees, customers, supervisors and co-workers. When I started spreading love, fear fled the scene.

After completing the last five-plus years of my career, I retired and made another dream come true by becoming a Christian author. Sabbatical of the Mind: The Journey from Anxiety to Peace became my first book and tells the whole story of recovery from paralyzing fear. Although my author journey has only begun, I can now trust God that whatever lies ahead, He is in charge.

Catch up with David on his website Sabbatical of the Mind or his Facebook Author Page David L. Winters ----He also has a Blog---

Purchase Sabbatical of the Mind on Amazon and on the STORE section of his website Sabbatical of the Mind   

                                                                               Purchase Sabbatical of the Mind

Please visit David's website Sabbatical of the Mind for other fiction & non-fiction books he has written.

"Neither is their salvation in any other: for there is none other name under heaven whereby we must be saved."  (Acts 4:12)

• Emily MyersThis is the story of how God intervened in my broken life and turned my past into purpose.....

In 2012, I was a single mom on welfare, unemployed, and addicted to drugs and alcohol. I was hopeless and in despair with a suicide plan, when a chance meeting with a stranger changed my life forever. I met a woman who invited me to an addictions program called Reformers Unanimous at her local church. It was there, that I was faced with the most important decision of my life.

I grew up in a very religious home with a large family. My mom was loving and attentive, but unfortunately both of my parents came from abusive childhoods, and so that cycle continued. My dad drank alcohol every night, and was violent and unpredictable. His unfaithfulness toward my mom affected our family greatly. There was no moral compass or guidance for my siblings and me. My childhood (and eventually adulthood) was marked by fear and mistrust of everyone. I was taken out of the family home several times as a child, living in various institutions.

I spent adulthood trying to escape the pain of my childhood. Failed relationships, abortion, drugs, alcohol, regret, guilt, shame, 10 years of counseling, multiple 12 step groups, false religions, self-help books, and the list goes on. I needed an identity, but couldn’t find one. What was missing? Why did I feel so empty inside? These questions haunted me every day.

By 37, life had come undone. I couldn’t handle one more failure, and the only way out that I could see...was death. I made the decision, that I was going to kill my daughter and then myself. It was no coincidence that shortly after this, I saw a news story about a woman in Florida who had the same idea, however...her son died and she survived. For that reason, I delayed my actions for several weeks and that is when God intervened by putting the Christian woman in my path. She showed me a kindness and acceptance that I had never known. She didn’t judge me, and wasn’t afraid to jump into the mess I had made of my life. If that wasn't enough...she held my hand through the darkness. For the first time, I saw the love of Christ through another person! Curiosity got the best of me, and one night I attended the program. There was a preacher there named Mitch Zajac, who shared his incredible story of redemption. He was as hopeless as I was before he too, was faced with a decision to make. He explained why Jesus came to the earth over 2,000 years ago. He came to seek and to save the lost! I knew I was lost! And, I knew I was broken! He asked me this question with urgency:  "If I were to die in a car accident that night, would I go to Heaven?" I thought I would go to Heaven, but according to the Bible I was wrong. I realized I was a sinner in desperate need of a Savior. I had been wrong about many things, but I knew I couldn’t be wrong about that. My whole life hinged on whether I would accept Christ or reject Him! I chose to accept Christ's payment on the cross for my sins, and in that moment...a burden was lifted from me that words can’t describe. Shame and guilt vanished and although, I still had the same problems, I now faced them with a new hope.  

Within a year, God blessed me with my best friend, Andrew, and we have been married 5 years! Our marriage is happy and healthy because God is the best matchmaker! I have been completely clean and sober for 6 years as of 2018! Through Biblical counseling, the Reformers Unanimous program, weekly Bible class, and church services at Valley Forge Baptist Temple, in Collegeville, PA,...I have experienced complete victory over addiction! Most importantly, God gave me a clear conscience after forgiving my sins. The one who made me is the only one who could fix me. God was the missing piece!!

***Valley Forge Baptist Temple in Collegeville, PA***                                                                                    

***Valley Forge Baptist Temple (Biblical Counseling Center)***

Emily's Testimony was featured on CBN's The 700 Club (click on link here to see her story)

      "Blessed is she who has believed that the Lord would fulfill his promises to her!” (Luke 1:45)

The night of the tragedy was an ordinary night for my husband and me—we just finished dinner; made a fire in the family room, and sat on the couch to watch TV. In the distance we heard a helicopter, but didn’t think anything of it at the time. All of a sudden, I got a very strange message on Facebook asking me to call the local police department. The rest is a bit blurry, for as soon as emergency personnel said, “Is this Abigail Dopico’s mother?”—the room began to spin. They proceeded to tell me, that she was being airlifted to a local trauma center with a severe head injury and we needed to get there as soon as possible.

The ride to the hospital was eerily quiet for my husband and I were stunned and speechless. I remember praying the entire time for God to restore Abby’s health completely. I also reached out to my prayer warrior friends who stood in agreement with my prayers. I had a sense of calm in the car as I prayed and somehow knew this would all be for the greater good. Upon arrival, the ER doctor had tears in his eyes when he told us, that he wasn’t sure if Abigail would make it, and if she did—he didn’t know she would be the same child that we knew. Although, this news was devastating, I trusted in the peace the Lord filled me with in the car as He consistently told me, “Trust me Felicia, I will restore her—just put one foot in front of the other”. Abigail survived the surgery and went into an induced coma for three days. The doctors continued to convey to us that they still didn’t know if Abigail would come out of this. At this time though, I was just grateful that she was alive and knew God would continue to provide for us and her. As the three days progressed, and we got closer to the time that the doctors were going to wake her up, they warned us again of all the terrible things that can happen—Abigail may never walk, never talk, she might not be able to swallow, breathe on her own, etc.—Fear gripped me again, but then, I was overcome by the words placed in my heart, “It won’t happen, trust me.” None of those terrible things happened—praise God! Abby, woke up asking us what happened? She told me soon after waking, “I was fine the whole time. I went to the penthouse with the man, the very large man.” I asked her, “What did you do there?” and she responded, “He made me all better.” With tears in my eyes, I knew it was all going to be OK and that she spent time with her heavenly Father. As the days went on, we realized her left side was very weak, to the point of having no movement. Again, I just knew this would be resolved in God’s time and slowly movement returned. By the time she got to the rehab facility, most movement had returned except in her left ankle and toes. The therapists told me that she had a dropped ankle. It may return or it may not. They made a brace for Abby that she might need to wear for the rest of her life. Again, I thanked God she was alive and knew this was all in His hands. Lying in her bed one day, Abby said to me, “Mom—look at my toes” as she moved them. As of today, all movement in her ankle and toes has been restored and the brace is in a closet.

Throughout this journey and the subsequent surgery, I had many moments where fear tried to steal my faith. It wasn’t easy. I will tell you that every single time fear said, “This might happen…” it never did. God remained steadfast in His promises to me and continues to do so to this day. Abigail is a miracle, God’s miracle! There is simply no other explanation for her survival and recovery. 

What has this done for me? My faith has been exponentially increased, and I was a believer in Jesus already. I always prayed and thanked Jesus daily for favor in my life, but this was a whole new level of my walk with Christ! I believe God chose us for this reason. Abby’s healing has amazed all the doctors and seeds of what Jesus can do have been planted. 

Click on link or book cover to purchase Felicia's book.

Tonijean Kulpinski, CBHC, BCHP, AADP, is a Certified Biblical Health Coach, Board-Certified Holistic Drugless Practitioner,  Owner of Heaven on Earth Healing Center, Inc., and the Author of the Best-Selling Book: Stop Battling Disease & Start Building Wellness: Your Guide to Extraordinary Health.

"You intended to harm me, but God intended it for good to accomplish what is now being done, the saving of many lives." (Genesis 50:20)

I remain humble as I learned the message of health the hard way. I was one of those teenage girls that struggled with my weight. I would starve myself to fit into the latest fashion all to regain it all back from nutritional starvation. I would yo-yo diet as a way of life, climbing up and down the scale which would cause me to lose bone and muscle mass. As I approached my 20's and 30's, this pattern of life continued and my health suffered.

At the age of 18, I became a hair stylist and continued these unhealthy dietary patterns. By the time I was 28, I owned a beauty salon and worked as a heavy-duty colorist, breathing in many toxic chemicals and not eating properly. I had panic attacks, severe digestive issues, thyroid problems, migraines, dizzy spells, bone loss, severe blood sugar issues, and kidney cancer. 

The diagnosis of kidney cancer was definitely the icing on the cake. Medical treatment was all I had known at the time; therefore, I was scheduled on March 11^th 2008, to have my kidney removed. Thank goodness the cancer was all encapsulated, which meant that the tumor was not anywhere else. The pathology report indicated that there were traces of hair dye in my kidney that caused the cancer—a direct result of my profession.

I was so scared not knowing where to turn and just prayed that God would give me my life back. I continued to suffer from many of the symptoms as were mentioned above. Two days after the surgery, I began praying for God to give me a sign that would lead me to what He believed would heal me. I knew that just by removing an organ was not removing the “cause”. Days later, my husband and I had gone to a local health food store. Well, the klutz that I am, I bumped into a bookshelf and a book had fallen to the floor. As I bent down to pick up the book, I felt an intense heat that radiated off of it and into my hands. I knew as soon as I touched the book that it was a sign from God that would lead me to my new life. The book is called The Maker’s Diet by Jordan S. Rubin. It changed my life forever and began my healing journey. The Lord showed me guidelines and principles through Jordan’s book on how to heal my body which is clearly stated in scripture. I never knew that the Bible was actually a manual for health—I thought it was just for spiritual needs. I started consuming 100% of biblically based food as well as a lifestyle program.

My body totally began to heal from all the various health issues that plagued me. Once I was totally disease free and living this level of extraordinary health that I never knew existed, the Lord then told me, "I have restored your health, and I want you to dedicate your life as a vessel to guide my children to restore their health." I was so empowered to receive such a command from my Lord and savior. I then, wanted to share this message to others and help transform this nation and world the way God healed me. 

I began by studying from the Biblical Health Institute and was certified as a Biblical Health Coach. I incorporated these life-giving services into my new wellness practice that was once a chemical-laden hair salon. I now guide people in life-giving paths to health and wellness—God’s way. I took as many holistic health programs that I possibly could that relied on Biblical Nutrition. I then, studied at the world’s largest nutrition school, The Institute for Integrative Nutrition, in New York City. It was there that I learned well over 100 dietary theories, the connection between nature, the human body, and mind—all to take my practice to a level beyond what I could ever imagine.

I have not only been blessed with total restoration in my body without drugs, but to be able to share this information with many others and see their transformation. I also teach holistic nutrition at a local college for adult enrichment. God has used me as a transmitter of health and wellness where I unlock people’s God-given ability to heal themselves—I do not encourage my clients to battle disease. Instead, we must stop battling disease and build wellness. So, when I asked the Lord to give my life back He never did—He gave me an entirely new one. 

Today, I am 100% disease and drug free, and each and everyday I reap the blessings of extraordinary health the way we were truly designed. I am the proud owner of Heaven On Earth Healing Center, Inc., where I place anyone that God sends me, with any form of sickness on the path to total health and healing. I have also appeared on TBN's Joy in our Town and Doctor-to-Doctor. I would never change my past because it was a reflection and journey to what my present and future holds. Thank you Lord, for not giving me my old life back! I live my passion simply because it is my purpose. I do not treat disease—I restore the body's ability to completely heal by itself.

Tonijean Kulpinski, CBHC, BCHP, AADP, is a Certified Biblical Health Coach and a Board-Certified Holistic Drugless Practitioner, and owner of Heaven On Earth Healing Center, Inc.

In May of 2017, Leon Smith Publishing released Tonijean's, first book, which became an immediate best seller Stop Battling Disease & Start Building Wellness: Your Guide to Extraordinary Health. The book can be purchased on Amazon.